Wednesday, 5 December 2007

Necklace charade

Now that I am not breastfeeding, and am now the un-proud owner of a pair of fried eggs, I very rarely get a chance to cuddle Betty anymore - though not for want of trying. When I am carrying her from the car to the house, or from the highchair to the floor, I try to prolong it for as long as possible, but she just gets impatient and starts growling and trying to catapult herself out of my desperate cuddling arms.

I have observed over the last few months that, like most babies, she is obsessed with items of jewellery. If a friend comes round wearing a necklace, it is the first thing Betty notices. She will sit there quietly, like butter wouldn’t melt, observing and eyeing up her prey, and then she will sidle up to whoever it is (it doesn’t matter who, it could be a necklace-wearing monster for all she cares) and pretend that she is being affectionate by appearing to give them a cuddle. That person then goes all gooey and cooey over my devious daughter, at which point, Betty goes in for the kill - the necklace. I have watched her carry out this act time and time again.

So, armed with this knowledge, and so intense was my longing to have a nice long cuddle with my darling daughter, I devised a cunning plan - an act of deception.

I never normally wear necklaces, but I still have quite an impressive collection of dodgy 80’s classics from my former life, and so decided to start wearing a different necklace each day. The first two days were relatively successful and went something like this:

I would put on my necklace of choice first thing in the morning, woo Tom with it, and then march merrily into Betty's room. She wouldn’t immediately spot the necklace and so I would say: ‘Look sweetheart, Mummy is wearing a pretty necklace today, doesn’t she look lovely?’ Betty would eye the necklace suspiciously with a look of distaste on her little face, but eventually would hold up her arms. I would pick her up and she would semi-enthusiastically go for the necklace. I would give her a pretend telling off and say: ‘No Betty, you're not allowed to play with mummy's necklace.’ (The mind games I put the poor girl through…) I would then get a lovely long(ish) cuddle, whilst she played with the necklace, slobbered all over my neck, and tried to strangle me.

By the third morning, Betty had outsmarted me and was not interested in the whole necklace charade whatsoever. I was very disappointed, not only because I wasn't getting the cuddles, but I still had at least five more necklace shockers to unleash on her, and was actually secretly quite enjoying wearing them.

15 comments:

Self employed mum said...

Very cunning Elsie. I used to do the whole reverse phsycology thing - 'No mummy doesn't want a cuddle' in a nice singy voice. Actually I still do it!

Beccers said...

Keep unleashing the necklaces! Even if you're just wearing Pjs it's fun, I promise. Or maybe now Betty's bored you could move on to hats, or scarves? There's got to be some way to bribe more cuddles out of her!

Suffolkmum said...

Loved this Elsie. I always used to wear a horrible cheap old locket that I had kicking around somewhere, because little fingers loved to prise it open. Betty is quite a character! Loved the mid games - I do that too - and great to see a post from Tom!

Jen said...

Oh my gosh, this was so funny! Perhaps, because I am not getting any cuddles myself?! They only want what they can't have, so self employed mum's idea might just work!

Ladybird said...

Very funny.

Lijy said...

:) My son Jason who is just 10 months old, does not like to be held in my arms anymore. Cos that does not give him the freedom to go around where ever he wants. i think, after sometime i'll have to do ur necklace bit.thanks for the idea Elsie.

Stay at home dad said...

Don't know what to suggest on the fried egss, but don't worry on the hugs. As has been said, when they're starting to be mobile they don't like it, in a while though she'll want to hug you again when she finds how scary the world out there is!!

Elsie Button said...

Hi SEM, as betty keeps outsmarting me i think i am going to have to try the reverse reverse phsycology.

Hi beccers, you would think so, but have gone through pretty much everything! she went through a time of enjoying playing with my hair, and even though she would pull it and yank it and it would really bloody hurt it was worth it for that hug!

Hi suffolk mum, arr that's a good idea - a locket, will have to try that one - puts a new angle on the whole thing!

Hi Jen, glad i am not the only one!

HI Ladybird, you are very kind!

Hi Lijy, i would save the necklace trick for when you are really desperate, as if he is anything like betty it will only work once or twice!

Hi SAHD, the fried eggs are just a design fault in post-feeding women (or perhaps i should just speak for myself!). Thanks for the reassurance re. the hugs - i hate the idea of the world being scary to them though. it's true though.

Potty Mummy said...

Oh, what a tangled web we weave... Totally with you on this one Elsie, I would do exactly the same thing. Loved the previous post as well; how on earth do they learn to be so determined so young?

Iota said...

Being out-witted and out-manoeuvred by your children from an early age - that's something they don't tell you about in the baby books.

Pig in the Kitchen said...

You are no match for the cunning Betty. Now, perhaps if Tom were to buy you a diamond necklace...
Pigx

Pig in the Kitchen said...

Fried eggs are easily covered up with a padded bra. You heard it here first.

IngeniousRose said...

I laughed out loud at this post Elsie, especially the part wear she tried to strangle you - she has out-smarted you!

Pig is right. My fried eggs look much better in a padded bra. I can't quite believe I've written that in a comment!

dulwichmum said...

Darling Elsie,

I think you may be in need of a second baby and soon! I remember this exact stage so well...

Crystal Jigsaw said...

What an absolutely adorable and very intelligent little girl you have there! Amazing how babies often outsmart us adults isn't it. Amy was just the same and still is.

Lovely blog, by the way.
Crystal xx