Betty breezed in from the garden informing me that she needed her bottom to be wiped. It transpired that she had decided to do a wee under a tree, but whilst doing it, in her words 'a poo popped out too'. She was genuinely amused by what had happened, as it had taken her by surprise as much as anyone, and so I could not be cross with her.
In the normal scheme of things, such an addition to my beautifully maintained lawn, the lawn where my baby Dolly roams around, often on her hands and knees, would have led to me going mental.
On this occasion, due to the sheer unexpectedness of the circumstance, I calmly went out with toilet paper, bleach, and scissors and removed the offending object from my garden, and no more was said on the matter.