Monday 9 February 2009

Don't let it snow

The snow has been great fun and Betty started off on the whole thing with huge enthusiasm, with every other word being ‘no’ (That’s snow to you and me. It took me a whole day to work that out – I thought she was just being negative and difficult).

However, the snow meant that we were housebound for most of last week and both Betty and I started going a bit stir crazy, and really started getting on each others nerves. There is only so much painting, fairy cake making, sledging and ‘let’s pretend mummy is having another baby’ games a little girl can tolerate.

Saturday was the first time we had been able to venture out since last weekend, and so Tom very kindly offered to take us out for breakfast at the local farm shop. Betty had obviously been cooped up for far too long, but wasn’t that impressed about the ‘going out for breakfast’ plan (specially as she had already had her breakfast), and so it seems that she went all out to provide as much of her own entertainment as possible.

Whilst we queued for our breakfast with our trays, she excitedly pointed at the (rather manly) lady at the till and very loudly shouted: ‘MAN! MAN! MAN!’ I swear Betty knew what she was doing. She never normally feels the need to point at someone and inform them of their gender.

We sat down and started heartily tucking into our huge fry-up. Betty promptly began carefully placing every baked bean on her plate into her ketchup and then pretended to get upset by saying: ‘BEAN BEAN. UTT-OH. OH NOOO’ and would only calm down once Tom had fished out each individual bean and placed them on her toast. Once she had tired of this charade, she began hiding particular crayons either behind her or under her, and then doing the faux-upset thing again by saying: ‘PINK BLUE UTT-OH. OH NOOO’ and would only quieten down once Tom had located the pink and the blue crayon, and so on.

Betty proceeded to do a very elaborate poo accompanied by all the grunting and then turned to the teenage boy on the next table (who was sitting with his parents and minding his own business) and said: ‘POO. POO’ whilst purposely nodding her head at him.

We hastily finished our breakfast and just as Tom and I were feeling openly relieved that we were about to get the hell out of there, a waitress came over to clear away our plates, and Betty pointed right at her and excitedly squealed: ‘MUMMY! MUMMY!’

Please don’t let it snow this week.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh Betty, you are priceless! Isn't it bizarre how children know instinctively how to be centre of attention, yet we spend so much of our adult lives shouting to be heard above the masses?

TheOnlineStylist said...

I've sat here reading this, nodding knowingly at the screen! One of last summers pub lunch outings proved to be a bit of a challenge as Small Child took one look at a rather large lady sitting within earshot (of course) and then proceeded to ask me six times "Mummy, why does that lady have such a fat belly?". Other Half was not of course present to distract as he was queuing for food with all the tourists!
We felt a bit snow bound last week too and this week are surrounded on all sides by large puddles... ones that would definitely appeal to Daddy Pig!

Anonymous said...

A great post, I don't envy you with the snow, a pregnant belly and a stir-crazy child! You were brave to venture out for breakfast!

Those of us without kids can read this and feel smug that we enjoyed the snow by missing work, building a teeny tiny snowman on our gate, throwing some snowballs at each other and tucking up warm inside with hot chocolates and the heating on full blast. It was lovely!

Sparx said...

Oh, I actually laughed out loud at the part where she informed the teenager she'd done a poo... I really live in the potty, hey?

Anonymous said...

Perhaps she was trying to blame the stinky nappy on the boy nearby.

CJ xx

Anonymous said...

We thought you might be interested to hear, we are launching ‘Little ASOS’ this Friday!
Now the little ones can join in the fun too. Drop by and check it out at asos.com

Love from
ASOS
Xxx

martine said...

I miss this so much. Just heard a friend is expecting again and it makes me all the more broody, but was 45 last week:-( your blog was my second laugh of the day, thanks for that.
much love Martine

Enjoy the Ride said...

We love this story and think it deserves one of our "Moments of the Month' awards. Email editor@enjoytheride.co.uk for more info.