Wednesday, 27 July 2011

My vacuum cleaner wrote my car off

I have been in a severe state of shock since last Thursday.

Having got back from Betty's 'farewell assembly' at her pre-school (emotions already running high), I decided to clean the car out - a rare event it has to be said.

Betty and Dolly were having their dinner with their grandpa who was visiting, and I was outside with Henry (the vacuum cleaner), rigging him up to the extension lead.

All car doors were open, mats were out and shaken, and Henry was happily whirring.  I vacuumed the driver's seat, without a hitch, then shoved the nozzle down between the passenger seat and the brake handle to try to get to a rogue Shreddie I had spotted.  The next thing I knew the button on the handbrake went 'PING' and my car started rolling away from me.  Bloody Henry, whom I have previously referred to as my 'saviour', let the frickin handbrake off.   Normally this would not have been so much of a problem as being the neurotic person that I am I ALWAYS leave the car in gear on our slopey driveway.  However, just 30 seconds before, I had pushed it into neutral to vacuum out all the crisp/biscuits crumbs inbetween the gear stick.

I dived out of the way, got knocked by the open door, and was pushed into my father-in law's car, then I watched as the car, who also decided to knock into my FIL's car, then went careering off down the driveway and down a steep bank at the bottom and into the ravine (as the recovery man referred to it) at the bottom.  I watched in absolute horror, car doors flying clean off as they hit trees on the way down, and my beloved car disappearing out of sight.

In my hysteria, I scrambled down the bank into the bog where it lay, and through a mangled doorway, I began sweeping off the remaining crumbs from the driver's seat.

Thank goodness no one was hurt.  A complete freak accident, but a shocking experience all the same.  The car is a write-off.  I was hysterical.  I have been beating myself up about all the 'what ifs?' ever since.

Once I had calmed down (only yesterday) Tom, who has been amazing throughout, commented: 'You've got to laugh, it is all rather slapstick'.

Henry got dragged down the hill with the car, but amazingly he survived and still innocently whirrs away as it nothing has happened.  However,  as irrational and callous as it may sound, he needs to go.

14 comments:

Emma said...

Oh dear, poor Henry. He was only trying to help!

did you have to explain all that to the insurance?

Elsie Button said...

Hi Emma, yes i did! I sobbed down the phone and asked: 'has this ever happened to anyone else?' 'Erm,erm, not sure, I am sure it has' he replied.

Nora said...

What a traumatic experience. I'm sure it was quite shocking. I would have been more than upset, although I don't know if I would have blamed Henry. Can't you give him a reprieve or was it just too traumatic all in all? I'm glad that you're okay anyway, at least physically.

Elsie Button said...

Hi Nora,thank you! My mind becoming a little calmer now :)

solveig said...

Oh my goodness, what a thing to happen. Hope you have recovered. x

Nel said...

Bad boy Henry, onto the naughty step.

I must tell my husband about this. Clearly a message to embrace slovenly kept cars!

Glad you weren't hurt.

I'm So Fancy said...

I'm pretty sure that if we had a car, our Henry would find a way to off it. He's a little princess, that one. Although glad to see he didn't actually hurt any humans.

nappy valley girl said...

Sounds awful! You poor thing. Glad no-one was hurt.

We have a slopey driveway too - will remember never to do that....

TheMadHouse said...

OMG, I really do not know what to say, but I am glad that you are OK

Potty Mummy said...

I love - LOVE - that you swept the crumbs off the seat after the car was totalled... x

Chatty Baby said...

As everyone says, glad no-one was hurt. Henry would have to leave our house too.

Vera said...

I am so sorry about this, but I really did laugh so much I had tears in my eyes! Its the way you wrote about what happened that did it! But I am sooooo glad nothing worse happened and that it was only the car and Henry who suffered. Bless you, but you are a grand writer!

Stelle Courney said...

Hmm, good thing nobody was hurt! That was a shocking accident, Elsie! It's hilarious in a way, but it's freakin' scary. Good thing Tom was there to comfort you...

Anonymous said...

it was an accident and be careful next time.


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